If you are a business, and especially if you are the US Government, please relay the following to your employees:

1. If your automated "customer service" message asks for my birhdate/address/order# or social security number-DO NOT ASK FOR IT AGAIN when the actual human finally comes online. If you feel you MUST repeat yourself, at least preface it by saying that you need to confirm the information; don't act like it's the first time you heard it.

2. When I, as the consumer, ask you a question-ANSWER IT!! Do not play used car salesman and talk around the issue until you've changed the subject.  If you are afraid I'll be unhappy, I'm more unhappy when you DON'T ANSWER THE DAMN QUESTION!

3. If I have to ask you to repeat yourself more than 3 times because I cannot understand a word you're saying, be proactive and politely transfer me to someone I can understand. The 4th time I ask you to repeat yourself  I'm getting a bit perturbed.

4. When I call you for a phone number for another agency or business that YOU have referred me to in my LAST call...do not ask for my phone number and billing address.  You don't need that in order to provide a phone number.  Asking for my billing address allows me to think you're going to charge me for something I've probably already overpaid for.  And you've already read my phone number on your intrusive caller ID.

5. Understand that if you've done the above and you then ask me to fill out a short questionnaire at the end of the call-I am NOT going to give you a good review.  (I don't tip lousy service at a restaurant either-my guilt doesn't extend that far).  And if you are the government, especially the Social Security office-put a service questionnaire in place.  When I ask for someone to comment to, the fact that there is no recourse for me just makes me go blog about your lousy attitude.  I pay your salary, and when you tell me my disability backpay is not a priority for you...well that's just insulting.  It IS a priority for me, and I don't appreciate the attitude.

While your CEO's and my representatives are raking in the big bucks, I'm sitting on hold and then having to listen to your rudeness.  Stop forgetting that you're being paid because of people like me..